The next day, I was on my way home to Dallas. Jeff and I talked and texted several times that day. He had already mentioned coming to visit me in Dallas, which we tentatively planned for Labor Day weekend.
In the meantime, I had one more week at my old job, and then I had orientation at seminary. We talked frequently, but it wasn't the same. I remember thinking, "I'm tired of talking to Jeff on the phone. I want him here."
But I had another thought as well. Within three weeks of meeting Jeff I thought, "Yeah… I want a ring from him by Christmas. I'm not ready for him to propose now. I'm not even ready to tell him I love him. But by Christmas, definitely."
About ten days before he was supposed to fly to Dallas, he called and said, "If I can find a cheap flight, can I come visit you this weekend, too?"
Yes!
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On Jeff's first visit to Dallas, he had to meet a few people on the JMAC – Jan's Man Approval Committee. This might sound stupid, but only if you haven't met all the guys I've dated in my life. Most of them clearly would not have gotten passed the JMAC. I get a little stupid when it comes to guys and I really needed to make sure that was not the case this time.
Jeff got the stamp of approval.
That weekend, Jeff told me he loved me, which was a little weird since I wasn't ready to say it back. The thing is, I had already planned on being ready to say it on his originally scheduled first visit. But then he arrived a week early and I wasn't ready yet! So, yeah, a little weird. We had to talk about it, but what could I do? I couldn't very well say, "Don’t worry about it cuz I already know I want to marry you and you better propose before Christmas."
The next weekend, he was back in Dallas. I was sitting there with my arms around him and I sort of hugged him a little tighter and I said, "I have you." And he said, "I love you, too."
Oh, no! He thinks I said it! And I didn't! I mean, I'm going to, very soon, this weekend. But I haven't yet! This is weird!
It's funny cuz I don’t even remember the first time I actually said it. I just remember saying, "I have you." I eventually told him that story and he thought it was hilarious.
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1 comment:
I hear you on the having to have the long conversation that you know is a mute point you just can't tell the other person. I had to have an hour and a half conversation with Laura about how it was okay for me to tell her that I loved her even if we were not engaged or married yet (previous dating issues for her, you understand). This conversation literally took place the day after I told my father that I was going to ask Laura to marry me. I too decided that it was inappropriate to just say, "I told my dad last night I was going to ask her to marry me, so it really is a mute point."
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